Kristin Bair O'Keeffe: Writer. Mom. Teacher. Traveler.

A Writer's Vacation: Can You Disconnect?

For the last eight days, I was in Borneo...breathing in this:

And sinking into that:

And taking in lots of this, too:

Now keep in mind that for weeks before we left Shanghai, I'd planned to work during our vacation. I'd planned to Tweet, Facebook, blog, continue to connect, and yep, even get some work done on the session I'm doing at the Shanghai Literary Festival this weekend.

But, alas, I forgot to take my travel adapter along, and believe it or not, the resort did not have an adapter that fit the three-pronged plug of my computer cord.

The result? I couldn't work.

WHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAT??????????

Nope, I couldn't work.

This was, at first, panic-inducing. "What do you mean I can't work? I have to work." My stomach coiled up in knots.

But after a few days of this:

 

And that:

I realized how much I needed NOT to work. Since the launch of THIRSTY back in October, I've been moving at lightning speed. Brain in overdrive. Body in overdrive. Soul in overdrive.

I needed to disconnect, and I'm pretty sure the great gods of travel adapters knew this and conspired to leave me, truly, wireless.

What happened?

I quieted down inside. That idgy feeling in my belly of "I'm not doing enough to get the word out about THIRSTY" and "How do I get THIRSTY to more readers?" went away. I relaxed. I chilled out. I played. I got centered.

And then?

The same thing that always happens when I allow myself some breathing room happened: I started to write in my head.

Tra-la-la. I was writing in my head. Waking from gorgeous, wacky, wonderful dreams with full sentences and scenes. Staring at the ocean and learning something new about the characters in my second novel.

It was glorious.

Now that I'm back in Shanghai, I'm trying to hold onto that feeling. That tra-la-la-ing. And the wisdom of knowing that I when I push a little less, more happens.

Flow.

We Pause in the Regularly Schedule Programming for...A TRIP TO BORNEO

Whoop! Whoop!

Those of you who've been looking for the regularly scheduled blog entries (Travel Tuesday: Writing the Far-Flung Life, Women Rock Wednesday, etc.) and my normal musings on writing, China, life, etc., thanks for checking in.

But...right now I'm lying on the beach in Borneo (well, actually, right now I'm in my hotel room, but a few hours ago, I was on the beach, and in another hour or so, I'll be on the beach again. And, of course, with a two-year-old there is much "lying on the beach" going on...mostly I'm chasing Tully, digging in the sand, chasing Tully...get the picture. It's lovely.)

Last week we were in China suffering a case of "too much, too many" (too much noise, too many people, too much traffic, too much smog, too many ____). So before one of us (hubby or I) began to exhibit bad expat behavior, we did what it takes to love our second home (China) again...we got out. It's like that sometimes.

Nothing a week in Borneo won't cure. :)

Here's a peek at our current digs.

Aaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhh.

The South China Sea.

Ooh, this is gooooddddd.

Who's ready for the beach?

Chinese New Year: The Lantern Festival at Yu Garden in Shanghai

One of my favorite things about Chinese New Year in Shanghai? The Lantern Festival which is (in my humble opinion) best celebrated at Yu Garden...lots of cool lanterns...a few cheesy lanterns...but gorgeous at night. (My daughter loved it!)

Check it out...

 

Mao. Right next-door? Obama.

 

 

 

Read carefully before you order: "Dumpling filled with ovary and digestive glands of a crab..."

 

It is the Year of the Tiger, you know.

Cool, huh?

Chinese New Year: Wulumuqi Road Prepares for the Roaring Tiger

Have you heard? The Year of the Tiger begins this Sunday, February 14, and here in China, we'll be ushering it in with gusto on Saturday the 13th.

With a bang and a bang and a bang, bang, bang. (in other words, with hours and hours of fireworks used to scare away the evil gods)

I've got my spring couplets (chunlian) hung on either side of our door, a door god (menshen) hung on the door to ward off evil and give a hearty welcome to the new year, and a red lantern setting in the living room. I even bought new red tiger placemats from IKEA. (Can't have too many tigers hanging around...nor too much red.)

This morning I took a walk around my Wulumuqi (pronounced oo-loo-moo-chee) Road neighborhood  to check out how preparations were going. Looking good...

The markets & carts are bustling today. Everyone's buying flowers, nuts, meats, fruits, and goodies. There's no mistaking it...the New Year's feast is a'coming.

Out with the old, in with the new. Out with the dirt, in with the clean. Folks in Shanghai are getting ready for a fresh start and that includes washing all the laundry before the new year. Bad luck out, good luck in. So clean your house, cut your hair, get new shoes, and do your laundry. All will show the gods you are ready for happiness, good health, and prosperity. (But once the new year is upon us, put those cleaning tools away. You don't want to sweep away the good luck!)

Have you washed your special red gutchies yet? What? No? Get busy then, because donning red undies on Chinese New Year is a must. Back in the day when the awful monster "Nian" came to destroy Chinese villages at the end of every year, folks figured out that he was afraid of three things: noise, sunshine, and yep, red. In modern China, everyone wears red undies during the New Year celebrations. Every little bit helps, right?

See what I mean?

Need to pick up a few last-minute lanterns, couplets, hongbao (red envelopes for gifts of money)? Here's your one-stop shop in my neighborhood.

Door gods & hongbao envelopes.

Fish are important during Chinese New Year. First, the Chinese word for fish, yu, sounds like the word for riches or abundance...and everyone wants to welcome riches and abundance into their homes, right? Of course. Thus the red fish. Folks also eat lots of fish during the new year celebrations because doing so will help wishes come true.

Speaking of fish...

And look, the fish seller himself...

Everyone around here gives and eats lots of oranges and tangerines during Chinese New Year. (My daughter has eaten 4.32 million of them in the past three weeks.) Why? Well, the Chinese words for gold and orange sound alike, and the word for tangerine sounds like the word for luck.

Bonus: If you can give oranges and tangerines with the leaves still attached, by all means do, because leaves symbolize longevity.

(Warning: Don’t give fruits in groups of four. In Chinese, the number 4 sounds like the word for death. 4 is an unlucky number in China, much like the number 13 back home.)

Don't forget your seeds & nuts...two more staples of Chinese New Year. Seeds for having many children and nuts for a long life.

And finally, East meets West. A New Year's party at the JZ Club. (Great jazz!)

More soon, my friends!

Gong xi fa cai!

Travel Tuesday: Writing the Far-Flung Life (Chinese New Year: The World's Largest Human Migration)

What are we doing in China this week?

Writing?

Always.

Practicing our characters?

Heck no! We're getting ready for Chinese New Year...the national holiday when nearly every single person in China travels to her home province for the celebration of the lunar new year...yep, nearly every single person...which makes this holiday the world's largest human migration. (I'm going to head up to the train ticket office up my street tomorrow and take some photos...the line is crazy long!)

Even though the New Year doesn't officially begin until Saturday, February 14, folks have already started to leave Shanghai by the trainload. Believe it or not, something like 25.63 million passengers will leave or come to Shanghai this year by rail, plane, bus, or ship (Shanghai Daily). 

25.63 million people.

Want to join them? Maybe by train? Here...try this one. Looks comfy, huh? You know, for a cross-country trip in China.

 

Or maybe this train?

While you absorb those numbers and stare at those photos, let me remind you writers out there that holidays, festivals, and rituals are terrific fodder for articles, essays, and stories. If you're writing about a far-flung place, investigate.

Here in China, as we move closer and closer to the Year of the Tiger, I'll be sharing a good bit about the celebrations, rituals, and traditions go along with it.

But right now, I'm going to go hang my New Year decorations (including a tiger on the door). Photos to come.

QUESTION OF THE WEEK: Far-flung writers: Where are you living? Traveling to? What rituals, celebrations, traditions take your attention?

Project Kindle, Post #6 (The FINAL Episode)

This...is...it. 

Do I love my Kindle? Can I read books on my Kindle?

Watch and see.

Travel Tuesday: Writing the Far-Flung Life (Me + New Place = ?)

Okay, all you far-flung writers, need a jumping off point for a new essay? Here goes:

When you:

• are transplanted in a new country
• are launched out of your comfort zone
• are separated from those you love by expansive oceans and thousands of miles
• are incapable of communicating with those around you because you don't speak the language
• spend minutes/hours/days pantomiming even the simplest nouns (and feel like a cross between an intrepid explorer and a complete ass every time you do it)
• struggle to interpret new cultural cues

you inevitably ask the question...

Me + (New Place) = ?

You can't help it. It's human nature. We're driven to define ourselves in relation to our surroundings. Especially those of us who are writers.

The first time I asked myself this question was back in October 2006, about six months after I'd moved from the United States to Shanghai, China. I was back in the U.S. on my first trip home and was feeling completely overwhelmed by the number of choices I faced in the cereal aisle at the grocery store and a number of other things. I wrote about it here (at my old blog).

Since then, I've mulled over this very question again and again...verbally and in my head...but I haven't yet (re-)tackled it on the page. It's time...I feel it coming. The distillation of who I am in China.

And you? Have you tackled this question in your writing?

Me + (New Place) = ?

If not, give it a shot. It has all the makings of a great essay.

If so, what was your answer?

Women Rock Wednesday: Eve Ensler (Who's Your Hero?)

Eve Ensler makes me stand up & cheer.

Do you know her? Of her?

She's this amazingly energetic, creative force who advocates all over the world for an end to violence against women & girls. She's a visionary who empowers other people with her actions, choices, and relentless campaigning. She says the word vagina (out loud! in public! on tv!) without flinching. She says the word cunt as if it's not poisonous. Didn't I tell you? This woman kicks ass!

(See what I mean? Standing up and cheering already...let me continue.)

Ensler is the brilliant playwright who wrote and created THE VAGINA MONOLOGUES, this crazily honest, heartbreaking, make-you-wince-and-laugh-out-loud-at-the-same-time play about women's sexuality. (If you haven't seen it / heard of it / read it, check your local listings for an upcoming performance; it's performed every year between February 1 and April 1 in communities all over the world.)

Here's a peek at Eve & glamorous pals getting ready for the 10th anniversary performance of THE VAGINA MONOLOGUES. One of the things I love is that although Ensler's life is so wrapped up in dealing with violence against women & girls, she is bubbly and light. Yes, she can be sharp, direct, and serious, but she isn't swallowed by the sadness she encounters. Instead she counters it (and all the forces that create & support it) with her unflagging determination and belief in all things woman. Watch...you'll see what I mean.

I could go on and on about Ensler (and here's one more link for you), but instead I want to know, What woman makes you stand up and cheer? Why?

* * *

*Ensler's new book I Am an Emotional Creature: The Secret Life of Girls Around the World will be released on February 9, 2010. It's a collection of over 30 fictional monologues of girls all over the world (including a Masai girl from Kenya unwilling to endure female genital mutilation; a Bulgarian sex slave, no more than fifteen, a Chinese factory worker making Barbies).

Travel Tuesday: Writing the Far-Flung Life (Shoe Leather Express)

Whenever I asked my mom for a ride when I was growing up and she couldn't (or wouldn't) swing it, I always followed my initial question "Can you take me to _________?" with the inevitable "Well, how am I going to get there?" (often accompanied by a whine and a preteen foot stomp).

To which my mom always gave the same answer: "Shoe leather express" (in other words, start walking).

Back then, that often meant that I walked to my best friend's house via the trolley tracks, the mall via the road that went past our church, and the swimming pool along one of the most commercial streets in our town. Along the way, I learned a lot. I always knew who was getting ready to have a yard sale, where the best wild blackberries grew, and how to avoid the biggest potholes. The long, solitary walks also helped me learn to pay attention...to the little things...to the aspects of a place that helped to tell its story.

So while my mom had no idea that one day I'd be living on the other side of the world writing about my far-flung life and helping others learn how to do the same, her solution to my travel woes--Shoe Leather Express--has become an important part of my writing process.

Whether I land in a new place or a place I've been many times before, I always put on my most favored, mostest comfortable walking shoes (in my case, Keens...those are my "winter" Keens [above] and my "summer" Keens [below]) and start walking.

During my first two years in China, I estimate I walked 1.75 million miles (give or take a few). In Shanghai, I walked on major thoroughfares, down old lanes, and through funky neighborhoods. I walked through the panda reserve in Chengdu, wandered about the Muslim quarter in Xian, and hiked on the Great Wall. Along every step, I paid attention to smells, colors, sounds, and the old woman selling knobs of ginger on the corner. I noted what I saw up close and what I noticed in the distance. I noted facial expressions and gestures. I gathered bits and pieces for the stories I would tell.

Sure, sometimes walking is not the easiest mode of transportation. (In Bali, I ran into so many not-so-friendly dogs, I ended up toting a big stick, and in Vietnam, dodging the scooters is not always fun.) But walking gets you up close and personal to people, food, language--the essence of a place.

So my advice to far-flung writers?

Next time you're deciding how to get from your hotel to a museum or your B&B to the beach, skip the taxi or the shuttle. Take my mom's advice and go for the Shoe Leather Express.

Happy Birthday to You, Happy Birthday to Tully...

So my daughter Tulliver is two years old today. I'd ask where the heck time has gone, but that would sound cliche. (But really, where has time gone?)

Tully's a hoot. A lovely, sparkly, funny, chatty, climbing-like-crazy, creative hoot.

Currently, I'm trying to teach her not to touch other people's nostrils (figured starting with others' nostrils is best; we'll get to her own soon enough). She's now obsessed with the "nostril" game. It goes like this:

"Is this nostril?" she asks, pointing to my forehead.

"I don't know, is it?" I ask in response.

"No!" she shrieks, laughing. "That's forehead!"

"Is this nostril?" she asks, pointing to my ear.

"I don't know, is it?" I ask in response. (Clearly I know my role by now.)

"No!" she shrieks, laughing. "That's ear."

"Is this nostril?" she asks, pointing to my left nostril.

"I don't know, is it?" I ask in response.

"Yes!" she shrieks, laughing. Then she gets a very serious look on her face and says (as she sticks her finger up my nose), "No touch Mumma's nostril."

Oy.