Look Who's Talking about Domestic Violence...

Whenever I'm asked, "What is your novel THIRSTY about?" I often say, "It's the story of one woman's unusual journey through an abusive marriage, set against the backdrop of a Pittsburgh steel community at the turn of the twentieth century."

If I've got time and space in an article, interview, blog post, or conversation, I expound on that. "It's a family saga that involves three generations of Bozic women and a story that explores how the cycle of violence is passed down from mother to daughter."

I've written about all this most recently at Writer Inspired and I'm absolutely sure I'll be writing/talking about it again.

But I'm not the only one talking about domestic violence.

Patrick Stewart--yep, the beloved Captain Picard--regularly saw his father hit his mother, and he talks about his experiences quite openly in this Guardian article. His story is profound and touching, and at one point he says,

The situation was barely tolerable: I witnessed terrible things, which I knew were wrong, but there was nowhere to go for help. Worse, there were those who condoned the abuse. I heard police or ambulancemen, standing in our house, say, "She must have provoked him," or, "Mrs Stewart, it takes two to make a fight." They had no idea. The truth is my mother did nothing to deserve the violence she endured. She did not provoke my father, and even if she had, violence is an unacceptable way of dealing with conflict. Violence is a choice a man makes and he alone is responsible for it.

A bit later he tells about his next-door neighbor Mrs. Dixon, who was (in Stewart's words) the only person who would stand up to my father. She would throw open the door and stand before him, bosom bursting and her mighty weaver's forearm raised in his face. "Come on, Alf Stewart," she would say, "have a go at me."

When I read about Mrs. Dixon, first I wanted to cry, then I wanted to find a way to thank all the Mrs. Dixons in the world, and finally I thought about Katherine, the character in THIRSTY who is Klara's Mrs. Dixon. On page 40, Klara..."looked at her friend, this heavy-thighed, wide-hipped woman with the strength and know-how to look Drago Bozic in the eye and tell him to mind his business."

Reese Witherspoon is also talking about domestic violence. In fact she is helping the charity Refuge to launch their new campaign against domestic violence and has recently spoken about the problem on morning talk shows. She even addressed Britain's House of Parliament about the issue. Read more about her role here.

If you want to read more about Refuge's new campaign against domestic violence--"Four Ways to Speak Out"--visit their website http://www.fourwaystospeakout.com/.

There's also a new documentary film called Recovering Irma that tells the true story of filmmaker Sandra Salas's mother, who was a longtime victim of domestic violence and in the end, a victim of a murder-suicide. I haven't seen this film yet, but I plan to.

So you see? I'm not the only one talking about domestic violence. Good God, I wish I were. I wish I were the last person in the world who ever had to talk about it...because that would mean it were no longer a problem.

Until then, I'll keep talking. Me and Patrick Stewart and Reese Witherspoon and Sandra Salas and many more. At least I'm in good company.

Comments

[Cynthia Schuerr]

Domestic violence is so prevalent, not only in marriages, but also in young teen relationships, when love should be pure and innocent. It really is a shame. I myself have never lived through it, but my heart breaks for those who have and still are. Thank you Kristin for keeping it in the spotlight.