Kristin Bair O'Keeffe: Writer. Mom. Teacher. Traveler.

Travel Tuesday: Writing the Far-Flung Life (Finding Your Own Chicken Man)

When you're writing about a far-flung life, your job is to get readers to see what you see. Remember, many readers have never been to the place or had the experience you are describing...and many never will. So...lure them in. 

How?

The #1 Way to Lure Readers In...

• Write About The Things That Interest You: Don't worry about trying to figure out what readers want to know. Follow your own heart...your own eye. If you're intrigued, your readers will be intrigued. If you're not intrigued, readers will close your book/article/essay halfway through and not pick it up again. Horror of all horrors.

(Example: If you're traveling in Milan, Italy, you may be captivated by the spires on the Duomo. Lots of folks are. If so, dig in and have at it. But maybe you don't give two hoots about the spires [or anything else] on the Duomo. Maybe you're more intrigued by the wacky folks who like to get the 1.22 million pigeons in the piazza to land on their heads for photo opps or the cranky old woman who sold you a strawberry tart. If that's the case, write about the pigeon people or the cranky old woman. Forget the Duomo and its spires.)

As for me, I'm rarely intrigued by the "big stuff." Sure, Shanghai's Oriental Pearl Tower is cool and interesting, and yup, the World Expo is coming to our fair city in May, but I'm drawn to smaller moments. Like the Chicken Man! He's one of my favorite characters in my neighborhood, and just this morning, my daughter and I ran into him on our street. (Okay, okay, I admit it, we were out looking for him...as we often are.) We were lucky enough to happen upon him just as a customer was picking out his chicken. Check it out.

The Chicken Man on the left. A discerning customer on the right.

"How about this chicken?" says the Chicken Man.

"No, I like this chicken," says customer, taking matters (and a chicken) into his own hands.

"Why does this crazy laowai (me) follow me around Shanghai taking pictures of me?" says the Chicken Man. "She must have thousands of pictures of me now."

And the Chicken Man kills and defeathers the chicken right there and then.

I tell ya what...he's good at it, too. He can kill and defeather a chicken faster than I can pick out a package of drumsticks at the grocery store.

This is the hard part...friends looking on.

Ta-da! Dinner!

WRITERS CHALLENGE: I haven't yet written a formal piece about the Chicken Man, but I know that eventually he will work his way into an essay or memoir. Your challenge this week? Find your own Chicken Man. In whatever place you're writing about, choose a person who intrigues you. Then write about him/her. A paragraph...a page...whatever it takes to see him/her clearly.

Project Kindle, Post #3: Infatuation

Spent lots of time this week hanging out with my Kindle in Shanghai. We went to a meeting on the Bund, had tea at the Ritz Carlton Hotel, cuddled in bed, and lots more. People are talking and the tabloids are asking, "Are you becoming a couple?"

Not quite yet, but...

Travel Tuesday: Writing the Far-Flung Life (Definitions)

Okay...since I'm going to be yakking with you every Tuesday about how to write about travel and a far-flung life, I figure I better start with a couple of key definitions. That way, all you writers interested in writing about your own far-flung lives will be on the same page with me.

Here goes...

DEFINITIONS

far-flung life

• a life in which you travel to different places on a regular basis (ex: I'm an American. My husband is from Ireland. Our daughter is Vietnamese. We live in Shanghai, China. We get around.)

• a life that jolts you out of your comfort zone

cultural spelunker

• one who arrives in a new country (state, city, etc.), looks around at unfamiliar people & places, smiles, & digs in

• fearless explorer (or perhaps explorer despite fear)

• one who is compelled by odd smells, strange glances, dark alleyways, wacky foods, cultural conundrums, language barriers, & so on

FREQUENTLY ASKED QUESTIONS (I'm anticipating...)

Q: Do I have to travel out of my home country in order to have a far-flung life?

A: Nope. Everyone's definition of far-flung is different. Perhaps you travel from Chicago to Japan twice a year...yep, that's far-flung. Perhaps you divide your time between Montana and New York City...yep, that's far-flung. Or perhaps you stick close to home but cross into a neighboring county twice a week...yep, that's far-flung (as long as--and this is the key--the journey throws you out of your comfort zone in some significant way).

Q: Do I have to be an expat like you?

A: Oh, god, no. If you travel & get out of your comfort zone, you qualify.

Q: Is cultural spelunker a real term?

A: It is now. I made it up.

All set?

Good. Spend the week thinking about your far-flung life and meet me back here in a week.

Happy travels.

Project Kindle, Post #2

Can a writer/book lover read books on a KINDLE...and enjoy it? That's what I'm trying to figure out during PROJECT KINDLE. Every Friday until I do, I'll post a new video on this blog.

This week I talk about three things:

• registering your KINDLE
• form
• function

(Ooh, and oh yeah, you get to find out what book I downloaded first!)

Do you KINDLE? Watch and weigh in.

Welcome to PROJECT KINDLE

Happy New Year! Right now in Shanghai, it is 11:59 a.m. on January 1, 2010.

Cool. A new year. A new decade.

As promised, I'm going to be announcing a few changes to my blog...and the first is the introduction of PROJECT KINDLE.

What is PROJECT KINDLE?

Good question. This video should answer all your questions. Come on...join me. This is going to be fun!

Libraries: A Love Story

All you readers and writers out there know what I'm talking about, right? That affection you carry around with you for the hometown library where you spent your formative reading years...

Thanks to an invitation to guest blog at "Write for a Reader," I had the opportunity to think deeply about the Bethel Park Public Library...my own hometown library.

Read all about it here: Write for a Reader

Washington Post Names John Thorndike's "The Last of His Mind: A Year in the Shadow of Alzheimer's" as a "Best Book of 2009"!

So happy to share this news!

John Thorndike is a fellow Swallow Press author whose beautiful memoir The Last of His Mind: A Year in the Shadow of Alzheimer's was just named one of the "Best Books of 2009" by The Washington Post. How cool is that?

What is The Last of His Mind about?

John says it much better than I. Here's how he describes it on his website:

My father, Joe Thorndike, was an independent New Englander, once the managing editor of Life and the founder of American Heritage and Horizon magazines. At 91, his one great desire was to remain in his own house, even as memory and language deserted him. He had once told me, after a visit to an old friend in a nursing home, “Don’t ever put me in a place like that.” So at the start of 2005, to allow him to stay at home, I left Ohio and moved into his house on Cape Cod. Slowly, in the months that followed, he lost the ability to carry on a conversation, to read a clock, to remember that his pants went on over his underwear.

In this book, John takes you on a profound journey...a private journey. It's a privilege to share it.

Look Who's Talking about Domestic Violence...

Whenever I'm asked, "What is your novel THIRSTY about?" I often say, "It's the story of one woman's unusual journey through an abusive marriage, set against the backdrop of a Pittsburgh steel community at the turn of the twentieth century."

If I've got time and space in an article, interview, blog post, or conversation, I expound on that. "It's a family saga that involves three generations of Bozic women and a story that explores how the cycle of violence is passed down from mother to daughter."

I've written about all this most recently at Writer Inspired and I'm absolutely sure I'll be writing/talking about it again.

But I'm not the only one talking about domestic violence.

Patrick Stewart--yep, the beloved Captain Picard--regularly saw his father hit his mother, and he talks about his experiences quite openly in this Guardian article. His story is profound and touching, and at one point he says,

The situation was barely tolerable: I witnessed terrible things, which I knew were wrong, but there was nowhere to go for help. Worse, there were those who condoned the abuse. I heard police or ambulancemen, standing in our house, say, "She must have provoked him," or, "Mrs Stewart, it takes two to make a fight." They had no idea. The truth is my mother did nothing to deserve the violence she endured. She did not provoke my father, and even if she had, violence is an unacceptable way of dealing with conflict. Violence is a choice a man makes and he alone is responsible for it.

A bit later he tells about his next-door neighbor Mrs. Dixon, who was (in Stewart's words) the only person who would stand up to my father. She would throw open the door and stand before him, bosom bursting and her mighty weaver's forearm raised in his face. "Come on, Alf Stewart," she would say, "have a go at me."

When I read about Mrs. Dixon, first I wanted to cry, then I wanted to find a way to thank all the Mrs. Dixons in the world, and finally I thought about Katherine, the character in THIRSTY who is Klara's Mrs. Dixon. On page 40, Klara..."looked at her friend, this heavy-thighed, wide-hipped woman with the strength and know-how to look Drago Bozic in the eye and tell him to mind his business."

Reese Witherspoon is also talking about domestic violence. In fact she is helping the charity Refuge to launch their new campaign against domestic violence and has recently spoken about the problem on morning talk shows. She even addressed Britain's House of Parliament about the issue. Read more about her role here.

If you want to read more about Refuge's new campaign against domestic violence--"Four Ways to Speak Out"--visit their website http://www.fourwaystospeakout.com/.

There's also a new documentary film called Recovering Irma that tells the true story of filmmaker Sandra Salas's mother, who was a longtime victim of domestic violence and in the end, a victim of a murder-suicide. I haven't seen this film yet, but I plan to.

So you see? I'm not the only one talking about domestic violence. Good God, I wish I were. I wish I were the last person in the world who ever had to talk about it...because that would mean it were no longer a problem.

Until then, I'll keep talking. Me and Patrick Stewart and Reese Witherspoon and Sandra Salas and many more. At least I'm in good company.

Meet Elizabeth Fournier, Author of "All Men Are Cremated Equal: My 77 Blind Dates"

As a writer, I love sharing the work and processes of other writers. Today I'd like to introduce you to Elizabeth Fournier, author of All Men Are Cremated Equal: My 77 Blind Dates. When Elizabeth wrote  this book, she was newly married. After planning a wedding across the country in only five months, she decided she could do anything. Elizabeth promptly sat down at the keyboard after her wedding in New Jersey and cranked out a fabulous memoir about her path which led to Mr. Right.

 

About Her Writing Process, Elizabeth says...
Best-selling author Anthony Robbins states, "A life worth living is a life worth recording." Before Robbins met his wife, Becky, he composed a five-page list of exactly what he did and did not want in a mate, mentally, emotionally, spiritually, socially, physically and intellectually. He explains the power of clarity and attraction in the relationship segment of his 30-Day Personal Power Series, “I believe if you get absolutely clear, you can attract what you want.”

Powerful stuff! I, too, am a believer in the list. A list is key. I made a list, gave it to my friends for them to hand-pick worthy suitors for my dating pleasure, and then sat and wrote about my year-long adventure. It wasn’t exactly a day at the beach; more like a day at the beach ingesting too much Lick-M-Aid.

I had pages and pages of dating stories that were bleak. Friends might have assured me that some great guy was sizzlin' hot, but these friends might be somewhat oblivious to the fact that their friend's dating ability hovers only around lukewarm. My pages morphed into a whole manuscript, with my devoted and loving husband standing by throughout.

I was married to my husband but dating my computer.  Did I mention we were newly married?  I wouldn’t blame him if he wondered aloud if life would always be like this. Devoted hubby never inquired why I needed to write all about my blind dates prior to meeting him.  I suppose he magically understood my meet and greet predicament was reflective of most everyone’s experience at some point. Possibly.

He agreed being single wasn't simple, whatever anyone said, and it would be comforting to read about another contender’s view on the dating game. My wonderful groom appreciated that single men and women everywhere were looking for their Mr. and Miss Right. Automatically meeting the right person is rarely effortless. Except for the lucky few, but that wasn’t me.

But I did have a tad of guilt attached to this process. Writing about a date is like being on that date again. I spent time alone with just blind dates and my keyboard. There are methodical writers and spurt writers. I am the jump-out-of-bed-when–the-thought-hits writer. When you’re a writer, you write. You get inspired. You move on it. Suddenly it was all I could do. I wrote and didn’t stop for a month, then two. It was all I did – work…home…write – that was my life.

But one day the manuscript was complete. I finished piecing my past back together. It's almost as if it was a puzzle - big box of a thousand puzzles. And it all began with one simple list.

About Elizabeth Fournier:
After she got over her dream of being a Solid Gold Dancer, Fournier promptly headed into the local funeral home and asked for a job, any job. She became the live-in night keeper which meant she resided in a  trailer in the far reaches of a large, hilly cemetery and slept with a  shotgun near her bed. It was the scariest summer of her life. She is currently the voice of the autopsy exhibit in the forensic wing at the United States National Museum of Medicine and a full-time  mortician. She is also a ballroom dance instructor at Reed College in  Portland, Oregon. But she couldn’t resist writing the story of her  unusual method of dating that led her to the love of her life.

You can find out more about Elizabeth by visiting her website: www.elizabethfournier.com.

Blog tour organized by...

More Kids Books by Amy Krouse Rosenthal

If you don't know AKR, you should. Her adult memoir called The Encyclopedia of an Ordinary Life is one of my all-time favorite reads (it's hilarious, especially if you grew up in the late 60s and 70s)...and her children's books are wise, funny, quirky, and creative. She's got four more kids' books out...or coming out soon.

Amy Krouse Rosenthal blog